Running Wild

Sometimes I feel as if my life has its own personality sometimes. Like my life is actually a thing, like an arm or leg that can move on its own. I feel like Im watching my life take different directions and turns, but similar to an eyelash, it seems to operate like an involuntary reflex. And then it hits me sometimes and i scurry to change it or manouver it in a different direction. Thats kind of how i feel right now. I feel like my life is about to go through alot of new changes, exciting yet unpridictable. But there is not alot I can do to stop time, and change the way it is progressing. I cant change people either. I may feel one way about the way my life is headed, but another may feel like nothing is even changing, or they may feel like life is not as serious as it really should be. Maybe thats when i begin to doubt myself, and instead of being in control of my life, it is like the eyelash that has to blink, whether you want it to or not. I know it seems crazy to compare a life to an eyelash, but when you really think about it, they can be compared. Some people put expensive makeup on an eyelash to make it pretty, or more attractive. But when they wash it off, the true apperance of the eyelashes are tiny, and barely there. Some people have alot of material things, like drive a nice car, or decorate their house nice to make people think their life is wonderful, but the person on the inside of that car or house may feel tiny, or not good enough. If you hold your eye open and try not to blink, it hurts, and it stings. Its your body telling you that you must blink. If you try and put your life on hold and change the natural order of things, you may not get what you expected, or wind up with regret. And that hurts. Maybe im coming to a new revelation myself as i write this, and i guess i dont have much of a point, exept that my life right now feels a little out of control. I wish i could force someone to jump on board with me and make life a little easier for all of us. On the other hand, i cant just stop life and wait for others. If i were to do that, I may loose the positive in all of the situations that are coming my way. And worst all, I may live in regret. And thats something i am not willing to do for anyone. I have to blink. If i shut my eyes I wont see the good things that will be in front of me.